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Thousands chant 'death to America' at funeral of Iran's top general Qassem Soleimani
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"This is Casey Kasem with the return of an old classic to this weeks top 40!"
Edit: Many thanks for the gold and silver!
Like, Zoinks Scoob, haven't we seen this clown before?
Millennial: Hey wait, I've seen this one before!
Gen Z: What do you mean, it's brand new?
It's an oldie where I come from...But your kids are gonna love it.
This is your cousin Marvin berry! Y'know that new sound you've been looking for? Listen to this!
I don’t think that funeral is going 88 mph
Gen X: No, this is a rerun of a rerun.
You have 2 TVs?!
Honey, he's teasing you. Nobody has two televisions.
Guess you guys weren't ready for that yet... But your kids are gonna love it.
Who the hell is John F. Kennedy?
This is getting heavy.
Is there a problem with the earths gravitational pull in the future?
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Death to America, death to Israel.
Israel: Hey I'm just happy to be included.
I enjoy hearing casey kasem count down the top 40 on sunday while out driving
Rock the Casbah yo
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I'm struggling with the fact this article came from the Onion.
The onion became a legitimate news site in 2016. They tried not to. They are.
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This is one of those articles that makes you wonder if The Onion is written by time travelers.
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Or maybe it's like 1984 which is repeatedly mistaken as an instruction manual by governments.
Predicting the future is fucking easy. Imagine the worst possible outcome, write it down. You’re doing to be right more often than not.
If they said Orange-hot I would have suspected they have a time machine.
But that article was 17 years ago?
No, they have always put out biting satire that reveals a greater truth.
It has nothing to do with 2016, or any other particular year.
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Yeah that's the point of good political satire, it's an exaggeration of the truth but not a lie.
What a mindfuck. The actual fake news became real news.
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~30%*
I wish we had compulsory voting.
Not sure that'd help. Brazil has it and elected Mr "DiCaprio is burning the Amazon". Australia also has it and look at how that's been working out.
Yeah, I'm not sure why people think that silent percentage must have some sort of quiet wisdom. They're not voting because they don't give a fuck or because they're completely disillusioned. Forcing them to pick something would most likely result in "fuck you too" votes.
Me too.
Tax cuts for actual voters. Problem solved
Tax hike for non-voters, we need the money
Because making uninformed citizens vote will solve everything. /s
If people are so disgusted or apathetic with the political options that they are literally forced to vote, you didn't solve anything by threatening them if they don't come to to the polls and check a box. You actually just made it worse. How about making a system that results in people wanting to vote?
Compulsory voting is an awful idea. You should always be allowed to show your disdain for the options or process by not showing up.
The Onion is unironically the best news outlet in the country, they just tend to release the story before it happens.
A bit like Idiocracy, The Movie. A documentary.
The Overton window used to move between left and right. Now it goes between reality and parody. I feel like the mayans were right.
The simulation was scheduled to end in 2012, but like season 8 of game of thrones it was left on and now they're just winging it.
With the episode quality I was kinda expecting Cersei to dab then throw herself off the balcony onto jamie.
The program ended in 2012. This is the sudden death round where the difficulty increases exponentially until everything is over.
It's the cold war. a state department official walks into a senators office. "Well, what do I need to know?" "Well mr. Senator, there are two groups in these dozen countries. One wants increase education funding, start treating women more equally, and nationalize their industries ." "Interesting, " says the senator, "I like it. Who are they?" "The socialists" says the state department official. "Can't have that, fund the other guys . Who are they?"
"Jihadists, sir. Far-right religious extremists. "
"Fund em. No way that'll bite us in the ass."
this joke is dedicated to the brave mujahedeen fighters, just like in Rambo III
Here’s another Onion piece (video) from November 2012 that’s quite prescient:
After Obama Victory, Shrieking White-Hot Sphere of Pure Rage Early GOP Front-Runner for 2016
I’m struggling with the fact that The Onion was around in 2003. I still have it in my head that they’re this young up and coming funny satire site. God I’m old.
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The Onion was first published as a free, satirical, weekly print newspaper in Madison, WI. At first, it was distributed only in the area of downtown Madison and the University of Wisconsin - Madison campus.
I was a Freshman at UW - Madison in 1988. Stacks of the Onion could be found in little wire bins at entrances of many stores, restaurants, bars & cafés around town.
One of my favorite pieces from the early, print Onion was one which the reporter described how he defended our reality against Cthulhu by taking the Great Old One on a bar crawl of downtown Madison. In those days, it was assumed that any given UW student (of which the reporter was one) would be a prodigious drinker. Ultimately, Cthulhu was drunk under the table and defeated by the intrepid reporter.
Edit: The Onion started in Madison, Wisconsin, but they expanded pretty quickly. First they expanded distribution to some of the University of Wisconsin satellite campuses & communities in the Madison area, and then to a few large US cities and university towns, then all over the US.
Also, there was "drunk of the week" where the Onion would find a random college kid who was drunk, take their pic, and publish in the paper the next week. I think the winner would get a Disc-Go-Round gift certificate or something.
The Onion started out as an actual print publication in the late 80s.
It's real fake news!
"From this war a million bin Ladens will be born." The-fucking-Onion nailed it.
It's fascinating how we live in an era where we have so thoroughly documented everything that we can actually see history repeat itself this clearly.
And it scary that the window of repetition is getting so small. The Iraq war started in 2003. Sixteen years ago isn't even a full generation cycle, and people are salivating at the prospect of conflict with Iran.
The USA was the one doing the bombing, not the one being bombed. Sure, war feels fair and clean when nobody turns your friends and family into collateral damage.
I am starting to believe the lack of a historical country shocking war on US soil is a big reason for all of this.
I am from germany, a country molded by blood and war. I mean the leading german minor was DEFINED by war. Germany lost 2 world wars.
In america everyone knows a WW2 veteran or someone directly involved with WW2. In germany there is no 85-100 that was NOT involved with the war. The US does not know what total war is.
I heared people talking about Vietnam being americas PTSD. The US lost 58.000 soldiers in Vietnam. The german Wehrmacht lost 58.182 man between 5th and 16th july 1943 in the battle of Kursk. In 9 days more german soldiers died in and around one city then in 8 years of vietnam. (and I am not even gonna talk about the 170k dead russians in the 9 days of Kursk)
In germany the man were at war, the children were helping on farms or ammunition factorys. The teens were in the HJ or other organisations operating flack and artillery. The young womans were all working as nurses behind the front. Middle aged woman wereused in the military industry.
This true scale of total war that most nations in europe have experienced is completly lost to the US. As long as they didnt they will not know how it is to have a village of 2000 people turning into a village of 1000 widows in a single day of the battle of Some.
Though I hope the US population never has to experience this though.
To add to that, we as germans are generally distrustful of ANY military intervention for any reason period.
Thats because we know how it feels to be the bad guy in a war: Exactly like being the good guy. Humans are capable of extreme acts of denial and self delusion and propaganda can fuck up your moral compass beyond recognition.
Now, the USA is not Nazi Germany and never was. You have confidence that while not perfect you are a force for good and war can sometimes be legitimate just look at WW2. And I for one am extremely grateful you did go to war against us. But the whole thing has made you more willing to go to war, while it made germans less willing to go to war ( which is one of the reasons we really dont want to spend 2% of our GDP on the military).
It’s worse than that. We act like the ~3,000 soldiers. We’ve lost in Iraq is unacceptable but we’ve killed or displaced over a million.
It’s not just that we don’t suffer in the wars we start; we don’t have any empathy for those who do.
I only made this exact point to somebody today. Americans love war when it’s not in their back garden.
It’s sad that the rest of the world (bar China and Russia probably) are all shaking their heads and hoping Iran doesn’t retaliate while the majority of Americans think they are going on an Indiana Jones adventure
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Is there an underemployed Nostradamus working at The Onion?
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I haven't made a single future forecast and I have more correct predictions than Qanon
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I thought the argument is "Q has to send out fake messages to confuse the deepstate"
Basically if it's true it proves he is legit and if it isn't it does prove it aswell.
I've read that Bin Laden never intended for Iraq or Afghanistan to win a land war. He hoped the U.S. would wage a long and costly war that would inevitably lead us into an economic depression.
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cries in 2008
2008 was based on shitty practices of banks handling people’s mortgages. It could have been completely avoided. The next recession will be a different beast
Well the next recession could be very similar to what happened in 08 actually. Because large financial institutions still hold that same amount of power, very few people were held accountable, and no regulations have been set to prevent it from happening again.
Actually there were regulations put in place, Trump and the crooked House and Senate rolled back the Dodd-Frank regulations. It puts the tax payer in a position again to bail out banks and lenders if there is another economic collapse due to risky lending. It is also said it could increase the chance of discrimination in mortgage lending. I point out Trump because he bragged about rolling back the laws.
No it won’t, trust me alright?
He himself actually stated that was the point
You say that and yet there are so many comments in my inbox that are basically "Bin Laden was too stupid to plan that". We trained Al -Queada where he was a General. Yet people believe he wasn't competent enough to understand that two poor middle Eastern nations would fail if pitted against the country with the biggest military in the world.
It's not even a complicated plan. Just go back a couple decades to see the Soviet collapse when they were entangled in Afghanistan.
It needs some help from other factors, but it's a decent strategy. Just another in guerilla tactics.
I don't think he intended anything for Iraq one way or another.
How could he? That came out of nowhere.
Another great one was:
"FBI Uncovers Al-Qaeda Plot To Just Sit Back And Enjoy Collapse Of United States" from 2014
www.theonion.com/fbi-uncovers-al-qaeda-plot-to-just-sit-back-and-enjoy-c-1819576375/amp
The “No It Won’t” section reads like the transcript of Trump speech, only with proper grammar.
Conservatives on twitter
Right up there with their “‘No Way To Prevent This’, Says Only Nation Where This Regularly Happens.” series
Gotta be US Vows to Defeat Whoever it is we’re at War With
“The United States is preparing to strike, directly and decisively, against you, whoever you are, just as soon as we have a rough idea of your identity and a reasonably decent estimate as to where your base is located.”
My personal favorite: https://politics.theonion.com/bush-our-long-national-nightmare-of-peace-and-prosperi-1819565882
Their writers were basically prophets during the last two decades.
Wow, eight months before 9/11. That's a pretty disquieting read, to be honest. I know it's meant to be satire, but do they really have to hit the nail that hard? And the promise to "sell off the national parks to developers" is actually happening now, with Trump giving oil barons the right to mine on parkland. Fuck this horrific timeline!
That's the kind of one where you want proof it was actually written in 2001 and not just given a false date for comedy purposes.
My favorite
https://local.theonion.com/not-knowing-what-else-to-do-woman-bakes-american-flag-1819566173/amp
The follow up which is, "Why does the world hate us?.. They are just jealous!!"
If you thought Osama bin Laden was bad, just wait until the countless children who become orphaned by U.S. bombs in the coming weeks are all grown up. Do you think they will forget what country dropped the bombs that killed their parents?
P R E S C I E N T
That's just common sense.
Our policies in the region have been awful since we took over from the British and French. The Ottoman slavers did a better job in the region. The last Iraq war was unnecessary. It solved a manageable problem by destabilizing Iraq and Syria and further strengthening Iran’s position. America’s fascination with Shia extremism is mind boggling given that most of the Shia extremism is limited to a few places in the region whereas Sunni extremism is much more widespread. We never punish our regional allies for their atrocities and their violations of national sovereignty. We punished the people of Iraq for something a bunch of Saudis did.
The people of the region are not blameless but the borders of those countries were drawn to fail. Nothing short of religious and ethnic partitions is going to stop the strife. (I know it won’t happen)
The Brits gave the Middle East as a ticking time bomb, and then MI6 had awesome foresight into thinking that helping Saudi Arabia spread Wahabi (spelling?) was a good idea...
Great example of media manipulation to escalate tension
A rather 'on the nose' example of manufactured consent
Meanwhile, thousands chant, “Death to America,” at many places that aren’t Solemani’s funeral for literally decades before Solemani was killed.
The sole purpose of this post is to outrage people. It’s literally just outrage-bait
This is an Irish tabloid.
A number of years ago, a corrupt Irish politician was killed in a car crash in Russia while he was on business.
This newspaper rushed to print less than 24 hours later that he was in the car with a prostitute at the time. Body not even cold.
She turned out to be interpreter and got a sizeable defamation payout from the paper.
They were once a respectable paper, but a gutter rag at this point. They were bought out a couple of decades back by Ireland's version of Rupert Murdoch, who suppresses stories that don't suit his agenda.
What do you expect from the independent?
They're literally a tabloid
Yep. It's so people like my dad can say "look, they hate us! They want to hurt us and are going to try!" to justify war and Trump's actions.
But it's like showing the rest of the world what Americans are like by showing them a neonazi march. The vast vast majority are not like that.
Conversely, the post exists to embolden people who hold the opposite view as your dad. "See! We shouldn't have assassinated that general. Now people hate us!" Even though they've been shouting that phrase for decades, not days.
I don't wanna be that guy, but isn't that all media outlets are nowadays?
Nothing to see here folks.
Just the usual dumpster fire black and white comments
Or white and black if you use dark mode.
True, but what kind of psychopath uses light mode on Reddit?
<raises hand>
Oh...shit.... he is the one
<backs slowly into the Shadows from whence he came>
You shall be my herald.
Tell them.
Tell them all.
Meanwhile tens of millions of other Iranians went about their daily lives and didn't do this.
Edit: thanks for platinum!
This wasn't in Iran. This was in Baghdad and the thousands of people chanting death to America were Iraqi.
This needs to be higher up. This was not in Iran.
In addition, this is the city where the US embassy was attacked just earlier this week.
People are chanting death to America in the middle east, more news at 11.
Our neighbors are came to Canada as refugees fleeing the war. They went back a week ago to visit family. They said they saw celebrations for his death. Currently waiting on a flight out because they are now Canadians and would be a target.
"Death to..." Is also most often not suitable for literal translation and is comparable to "go to hell" (in a conversation between devout people).
That's my understanding, though I moved out of Iran at young age.
You also have to consider the possibility that these people may have been mobilised with dirty tricks like Venezuelan government's counter-protesters who are threatened with losing their job if they don't show up.
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I can get behind "death to traffic"
Death to traffic! 🚥
Something Iranians and Americans can agree upon.
I want a reality show with Iranians and Americans together in cars stuck in traffic. Getting coffee.
"Americans and Iranians in cars getting coffee"?
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So kind of like saying “fuck America!”?
I have always interpreted it as a Fuck this thing. Like death to this traffic would be fuck this traffic. It death to America would be fuck America.
This is correct. "Death to..." is much more akin to saying "down with..." in a harsh sense, than "We want them all to die."
But that doesn't get the clicks or rattle the sabers in the same way, ya know?
Just like 350 million Americans went about their day and didn't bomb a foreign country. We still get blamed for it.
Well, it's supposedly a democracy so we are responsible. No real way out of that.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Democracy_Index According to wikipedia we are a “flawed” democracy. But yes, there’s no real way out of that.
The media will focus on the 1% negative not the millions that want peace. If this escalates it’s going to a few people causing it on both sides.
I mean, welcome to warfare?
And millions stayed home and don't care.
This, Iran like any other massive country has people who are extremely nationalist. I can name people the same way in the USA.
If Mark Esper was killed in a drone strike by Iran, would anyone expect personal opinions on the man to really shape how we felt about a Secretary of Defense being killed? I don't think so. The nonchalant "Iranians and Iraqis will be happy these guys died" attitude is completely detached from reality.
I’ve spoken to my Iranian in-laws and they could care less that he was killed. They say the majority of Iranian people don’t support the regime and the uneducated ones that are indoctrinated don’t represent the people.
That sounds familiar..
Weird right?
brb going to the Internet to make an Iranian friend
normal people are normal and there's tons of them, literally everywhere. not that you could ever tell with the garbage they feed us on the news.
politicians are garbage people
I’ve spoken to my Iranian in-laws and they could care less that he was killed. They say the majority of Iranian people don’t support the regime and the uneducated ones that are indoctrinated don’t represent the people.
“I asked my Cuban-American friends in Miami and they don’t really care for this Castro fella.”
And even if those friends existed in reality, and even disregarding the infinitesimal importance of a sample size consisting of "my in-laws" or "my friends", one'd have to take into account the demographics of reddit. A real life example:
I have around a dozen American friends/acquaintances. I asked them whether anybody would vote for Trump and, as unbelievable as it may seem, according to their answers the man is now your president with 0% of the vote! The counting system must've royally fucked up!
Similarly, I can't comprehend how my country's right-wing populist party is leading in the polls when nobody I asked would vote for them! What a conundrum.
The point is people might not care about the guy, but the government did and it will lead to some dramatic reaction from them which could put the country at war. People of Iran don't deserve this
Yeah. I don't think their government cares what their people think about this.
Only thousands? I thought that country had millions of people.
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Who knew
Bingo! The regime sucks. I don't go to Iran anymore with my Iranian passport because I would have 0 rights there.
Some of the protesters chanted this, not thousands.
We actually haven’t seen any chants we’re just reporting them.
So pretty much the same as any other day.
Edit : fuck you people that give reddit money. Fuck reddit.
Its been Iran's slogan for 40 years
Overthrowing leaders and installing puppets tends to have that effect.
America failed in the first (Mossadegh's ousting was due primarily to his losing support among key groups), and supported the second (which was a real problem, considering the Shah's actions).
America didn't install the Shah, but not for lack of trying. Far greater sins were committed by helping Iraq in the Iraq/Iran war.
And shooting down a passenger jet with 290 civilians on it, 66 of them were children. I’d say that upset them more.
Then refusing to apologies and giving the people who shot down the plane medals. I wonder why Iran is so hostile.
Interesting fact: someone planted a car bomb in Captain of the Vincennes’ wife’s car a year later.
“SAN DIEGO — A pipe bomb Friday destroyed a van driven by the wife of the captain of the cruiser Vincennes, which mistakenly shot down an Iranian airliner last year. Authorities suspect it was a terrorist attack.”
”https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1989-03-12-mn-883-story.html”
edit: the article says “last year“ but the article was written in 1989.
Absolutely. God, I always forget that one.
What's this about shooting down a passenger jet?
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BP caused the whole thing, IMO.
This is happening in Iraq:
Mourners attend the funeral of the Iranian Major-General Qassem Soleimani in Baghdad, Iraq
One important distinction, this was in Baghdad. Iran's influence has grown quite a bit, said it from the beginning of the invasion that Iran would fill the void.
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Lol. I actually read this already today. It was in the Times of Israel.
**Edit: name of publication
Aparently hating reddit gold gets you more gold. That sucks man.
Newsflash: They did the same thing last week.
The Iranians did it for the last 5 decades
Oh God not the 'death to America' chant, anything but that!
Just FYI to everyone here. Those are NOT Iranian or Iraqi people. This is an Iranian backed militia. You can tell by the Yellow and white flags. That's not the flag of any country in the region. These arw flags of extremist militias. The Iranian militia that attacked the US embassy had the same flags. Don't confuse them with the actual people, because they're not.
Isn't 'Death to America' the Iranian version of 'We Are The Champions'?
No they are not, those that are upset by this are a very small minority in Iraq/Iran. There are more citizens of those countries that don’t care and/or are happy with Salami being gone.
The news is drumming it up for clicks. They want to create hysteria to get you to click it. Good news doesn’t do that.
Edit: I want to hear u/washingtonpost opinion on my comment.
News exists because it sells advertising. I'm not saying it's a good thing, but it's like a plant that grows towards the light, where the light is advertising revenue (or subscriptions, rarely). "Most Iranians fairly neutral on subject of America" sells absolutely nothing.
This hasn’t always been the case for journalism.
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They also want to start a war so propaganda is the first step.
ETA: by ‘they’ I meant the US but mainly just Trump
This headline is so outrage-baity it’s sickening.
They were chanting Death to America a week ago too, and the week before that, month before, year before. Fuck, they even have developed an emoji for it.
So?
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They’re also a very small percentage of the actual population. A majority of people over the really don’t care that he was assassinated. Most don’t even like their own government or it’s policies so it’s really nothing to be worried about.
In fact, some Iranians have even been attacking and tearing down anti-US propaganda. See this video for instance.
No, see that says DOWN with USA. That means the sign is totally down with us but the protester disagrees.
I keep seeing this but where is it coming from? People are talking like there already have been official polls in Iran about this
Oh, the propaganda machine is starting this early huh, what's next to hit the front page, a shaky cell phone video of someone burning the flag ?