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[–]Jackot45 7661 points7662 points  (191 children)

It bloody bodyslammed the robot bug

[–]MightyCaseyStruckOut 3761 points3762 points  (119 children)

Actual bug truly is the alpha. Hopefully a female bug was watching.

[–]JustHugMeAndBeQuiet 3410 points3411 points 5332& 9 more (86 children)

Hell, I'd fuck him.

[–]NebulaBritain 1144 points1145 points  (29 children)

[–]Alleleirauh 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Oh please, that beetle would be the one doing the fucking.

[–]mrplatypus81 88 points89 points  (17 children)

This made me laugh out loud while in class. And it sounded like Goofy. A straight up "he-yuk". Now people are staring.

[–]JustHugMeAndBeQuiet 55 points56 points  (9 children)

Do it again. Assert dominance. If they ask what you're laughing at, describe it in great detail.

[–]jellybellybean2 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Just explain it’s because someone said they’d fuck a bug.

[–]notoriousnationality 23 points24 points  (2 children)

Thanks for the loud lol I just had :))))

[–]Luxpreliator 83 points84 points  (6 children)

I want to be a wingman for beetles. Set up staged fights with robot bugs to make the real bugs look sexy. Be like one of the matchmakers but for bugs.

Did that whole collect lightning bugs in a jar thing as a kid once and I totally got one of them laid. Best feeling ever. Thought the one I found on the ground was a dude too tired to fly. Was probably the one lady.

[–]MommysLittleBadass 30 points31 points  (2 children)

Get a degree in beetle husbandry and you could probably head the US department of energy.

[–]kynmites 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Or try and shut it down and end up in charge of it.

[–]EnemiesAllAround 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You are the hitch of beetles

[–]Dies2much 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Wingman level 3000

[–]pilgrimprincess 31 points32 points  (5 children)

The Alpha is the female.

[–]Swordf1sh_ 16 points17 points  (2 children)

Came here to say this. These fools just assuming it's a male beetle lol.

[–]DamnYouVodka 207 points208 points  (33 children)

Dung Beetles know how to keep their shit together

[–]sdfgh23456 115 points116 points  (30 children)

That's not a dung beetle, some type of stag beetle I think

Edit: stag beetle, not stage

[–]Hiraeth68 55 points56 points  (17 children)

Rhinoceros beetle, I think.

[–]ShowereringCats 38 points39 points  (12 children)

I think its a hercules beetle and not a rhinoceros one.. unless im wrong

[–]ShowereringCats 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Hol up we're both wrong

[–]sdfgh23456 12 points13 points  (8 children)

Hercules beetle is a rhinoceros beetle, right?

[–]Greaterbird 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Rhino beetles have vertical pincers

[–]pATREUS 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Google Lens says it's a Rainbow Stag Beetle from Australia/New Guinea. I used to play with their glossy black cousins in the UK, until I got bitten. Fun times.

[–]Tinypro2005 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Take my upvote and leave

[–]scottishfighter_ 4 points5 points  (0 children)

yeah- in theys bloody MOUF

[–]android24601 43 points44 points  (1 child)

Beetle was like "what the hell is this? Bitch, please" SEISMIC TOSS

[–]RecoveringPessimist4 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Thorax slammed *

[–]Drakena_Amaterasu 12 points13 points  (1 child)

Heracross used earth toss, it's super effective!

[–]HotWingus 10 points11 points  (1 child)

the beetle borg*

[–]ArchaicObelisk 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Of the Big Bad variety?

[–]Wcounty87 2807 points2808 points  (19 children)

this beetle's totally getting laid tonight

[–]ElegantCatastrophe 825 points826 points  (12 children)

Or he'll be too busy telling the story to everyone he meets all night.

[–]ohgodspidersno 324 points325 points  (2 children)

"He had me in the first half not gonna lie"

[–]Stark556 162 points163 points  (2 children)

“Yo this fuckin robot beetle came at me earlier man the government is trying to replace us maaan”

[–]bissozwei 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Fucking Beetle Gates is in on it too

[–]jeesh 39 points40 points  (4 children)

“BOOM! You lookin’ for this??”

[–]smb_samba 12 points13 points  (1 child)

My man must have felt like a fucking champ after taking that robot out.

[–]ADRIFT_ABORT 1285 points1286 points  (45 children)

This is just metal.

[–]kuntfuxxor 395 points396 points  (12 children)

[–]Clutch63 15 points16 points  (2 children)

I can only imagine your joy when the little icon popped up after hitting reply.

[–]kuntfuxxor 4 points5 points  (1 child)

Nah i actually knew about that one, used to be better.

[–]Isteppedinpoopy 41 points42 points  (3 children)

There’s some plastic and silicon in there too

[–]BeeApples 24 points25 points  (23 children)

We all know metal came from the Beatles. (I'm not kidding btw)

[–]Imactuallymort 7 points8 points  (21 children)

Elaborate

[–]BeeApples 32 points33 points  (19 children)

In like 1967 Paul read an article about a new song The Who was coming out with and in the article Pete Townshend of The Who said "it's the loudest most raw rock song ever" (I Can See for Miles - The Who). After reading this Paul said to himself "well we can't let those guys try and get ahead of us in any way" so Paul wrote "Helter Skelter" which many many people believe to be the beginning of metal music

[–]havereddit 20 points21 points  (18 children)

[–]K4rmaaaa 18 points19 points  (11 children)

Also the first black sabbath album too

[–]ytinasxaJ 24 points25 points  (10 children)

I consider Black Sabbath to be the origin of metal, I don’t think just using distortion cuts it

[–]K4rmaaaa 6 points7 points  (9 children)

I suppose a lot of that was lack of access to distortion pedals in the 70s so they probably bad to destroy their amps a bit to create that overdriven sound

[–]pinniped1 1134 points1135 points  (76 children)

Godzilla vs Mecha Godzilla

[–]KneeDeepInTheDead 128 points129 points  (73 children)

Did Godzilla ever fight a Beetle monster? Im curious to watch that now.

[–]wrathking 136 points137 points  (72 children)

Yes, he did! His name was Megalon.

[–]KneeDeepInTheDead 39 points40 points  (64 children)

Guess im gonna watch this tonight. Thanks!

[–]Joba_Fett 20 points21 points  (41 children)

Remember to tell us what you think! General consensus is: MST3K’s version is a vast improvement.

[–]KneeDeepInTheDead 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh they did their take on it? Shit, I might have to do that instead.

[–]NateZilla10000 7 points8 points  (14 children)

Awesome you're taking interest in Godzilla, but fair warning: Godzilla vs Megalon is one of the ridiculous ones. Funny and campy as hell, but ridiculous.

[–]Jackot45 690 points691 points  (70 children)

Hahaha holy shit, the robot stood no chance

[–]Thiccboi_joe 414 points415 points  (66 children)

The robot was mostly made of plastic and beetles can carry up to 850 times their own weight. Edit: word

[–]WHITEBLADE___ 258 points259 points  (41 children)

850? Can somebody send me their workout schedule

[–]MothFucker_69 423 points424 points  (27 children)

100 pushups, situps, squats and 10km run every day

[–]Ieznoo 297 points298 points  (17 children)

Warning

By doing this workout routine you may lose all of your hair, proceed with caution

[–]ThunderStray 134 points135 points  (9 children)

and also getting extremely bored

[–]Kidney__Failure 85 points86 points  (4 children)

Yeah but you get a sweet apartment

[–]Darebear420 26 points27 points  (3 children)

That you ultimately destroy tryna catch a fly

[–]MegaMindBigBoi 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Then you meet a cyborg who becomes your disciple

[–]themagpie36 11 points12 points  (3 children)

It's not that tine consuming. You could do all of that in a few hours.

[–]the2ndsmartestperson 29 points30 points  (2 children)

Yeah, but what do you do when you get so jacked that nothing is a challenge anymore?

[–]ChipsHanden 19 points20 points  (1 child)

Become a hero for fun, of course.

[–]Joba_Fett 3 points4 points  (0 children)

But never stop! Not even when your elbows start making weird clicking noises!!

[–]fnordcinco 22 points23 points  (0 children)

Also, don't use heat in the winter or AC in the summer.

[–]door_food 14 points15 points  (0 children)

3 meals a day, but just a banana for breakfast is fine

[–]PM_ME_IF_U 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I KNOW THIS QUOTE NOW

[–]copperholic 15 points16 points  (9 children)

I think their limbs work on pneumatics instead of muscle. Maybe hydraulics.

[–]Roflkopt3r 25 points26 points  (5 children)

Some such systems exist, but they mostly use normal muscle fibres that can also be found in vertebrates.

Their high relative strength is due to the cube-square-law: when you scale a creature up, its weight increases faster than its strength. This is because the volume (and therefore the weight) of a 3-dimensional object scales in a cubic fashion, whereas muscle strength scales with the crosssection, i.e. in 2 dimensions and thus with a square function.

This means very big animals like elephants have a lower power/bodyweight ratio, while very small ones like mice and insects a very high one.

[–]cheers_and_applause 27 points28 points  (11 children)

FYI only four Beatles ever existed.

A beetle is a kind of bug. "Beatles" was a pun about the hair and music of four young men from Liverpool.

[–]MrSpencerMcIntosh 7 points8 points  (4 children)

Unless you include Pete Best and George Martin, than its 6

[–]lodpwnage 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Can they carry here own weight?

[–]Wes___Mantooth 660 points661 points  (71 children)

That beetle probably has an inflated view of its own strength now, it now thinks it can take on bugs much bigger than it. You just know he thinks he's hot shit now and is going to go in to his next fight cocky and get wrecked.

[–]redgreenapple 170 points171 points  (66 children)

Maybe it can? Is bug strength correlated with bug size? I can think of a few big dumb weak bugs. Also I wonder if it’s not the size that matters but the motion

[–]RonVen 103 points104 points  (56 children)

ants can carry 5,000 times its own weight, so bug size probably doesnt have anything to do with its strength

[–]Cory123125 55 points56 points  (44 children)

I love how as Ive scrolled down the number of weight this bug can lift has multiplied.

From 850x to 5000x, by the bottom itll be able to lift the world.


I misread

[–]throwawayy2k2112 48 points49 points  (34 children)

To be fair, 850 was the beetle and 5000 was about ants. I’m not fact checking this shit though so you’re probably right

[–]RicardoR12534 16 points17 points  (32 children)

The value of gravity doesn’t change between bigger and small bodies, it's a constant after all. The smaller the animal, the more insane that number will be. It so happens that the ant is the smallest animal commonly known. Just my two cents.

[–]hooahmont 14 points15 points  (24 children)

The ant is most definitely not the smallest animal commonly known...

[–]stay_fr0sty 15 points16 points  (2 children)

bug size

Don't you mean "bug weight" doesn't have anything to do with its strength? 5,000x their own "size" would mean an ant could lift a (very light) object that is like 100 ft in length.

That would be terrifying.

[–]Wes___Mantooth 21 points22 points  (4 children)

Yeah but if it was facing off a larger bug of the same species the larger bug would probably win. This bug vs a real bug the size of that robot, big bug wins.

[–]gregeggblegh 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I can’t remember what these guys are called right now, but I know they “joust” with other males just like this (centred around mating, what). He’s using his bug body exactly the way he’s meant to - I’m sure this robot bug was big/heavy, but put up less of a real “fight” than his instincts prepared him for!

Edit: I did an amateur google search, green stag beetle looks very similar but I am also not confident in my entomology skills

[–]GalaxyClassNerd 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Next encounter is going to be rough for this guy.

[–]_HaiseSasaki_ 261 points262 points  (11 children)

Joubin is going to want to see this.

[–]mohmar2010 82 points83 points  (0 children)

Speed kinging to this battle

[–]onefatbadger 74 points75 points  (0 children)

I scrolled all the way down here just to find this and validate my tastes

[–]PolypsychicRadMan 45 points46 points  (0 children)

Was looking for this comment

[–]snapekillseddard 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Joubin gonna N U T King Call.

[–]Sp33dl3m0n 25 points26 points  (0 children)

Ah a fellow cultured individual.

[–]Spoon420Blaze 23 points24 points  (0 children)

fuck josuke

All my homies love beetle battles

[–]slinkywarrier 24 points25 points  (0 children)

WARNING, GORE! WARNING, GORE!

[–]SHIZZZAAAA 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Scrolled all the way to find a jojo reference (very much worth my time)

[–]Kolo5daboss 6 points7 points  (0 children)

you beat me to it

[–]Twirlingbarbie 238 points239 points  (77 children)

WASTED

[–]DefNotBenShapiro 49 points50 points  (73 children)

I know that you can bold text with **, but how do you get large text?

Edit: figured it out

[–]Canop 53 points54 points  (32 children)

Probably like this

[–]DefNotBenShapiro 38 points39 points  (30 children)

Bruh

[–]Canop 25 points26 points  (17 children)

It comes from markdown formatting: main headers are prefixed with a # (# Example). Second level headers by two #, etc.

Big title as example

Smaller title

Third level

[–]TrdNPnchBwl 9 points10 points  (5 children)

TRYING

still trying

smaller

awesome
#will it go even smaller

[–]TriLexMiester 145 points146 points  (9 children)

So where is Jojolion fans are?

[–]megabex0 35 points36 points  (1 child)

Hi

[–]siccoblue 11 points12 points  (0 children)

Jojo fans? On reddit? Don't be silly. Not like they've completely taken over this website

[–]cripwalktothegrave 17 points18 points  (4 children)

Came down here to comment the same thing, fuck Endless Calamity

[–]machu_pikacchu 14 points15 points  (3 children)

I really liked the dynamic of Wonder of U at first, but I really want this battle to end now.

[–]rough_bread 11 points12 points  (1 child)

WOU be like, BUT WAIT THERES MORE

[–]HiHowIsYourDayGoing 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Pocket stand GO!

[–]-__-_--_----_-___- 9 points10 points  (0 children)

It seems longer because the CHAPTERS take long to release, so it's like the battle is months long. But they're actually chapters, the real battle would be just as long as the made in heaven or the world fight

[–]forreal-_- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hoped to see one

[–]tyler_the_treeman 73 points74 points  (58 children)

Any source on the song?

[–]Silent-Sympathy 190 points191 points  (56 children)

Red Alert C&C Soundtrack: Hell March
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3HUWUtTZvK4

[–]scratchyNutz 68 points69 points  (3 children)

Yeah, it got an upvote from me on the strength of that alone.

[–]Aggressive_Floor2545 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Red Alert was warning us about Yuri who got Americans to install a Soviet puppet without a single Airship.

[–]Sandite 8 points9 points  (1 child)

Humbling times I'm living in when the music from the game of my youth is referenced so far below the top comment...

[–]Ssmo72 63 points64 points  (26 children)

Man hearing that brought back memories

[–]the_murder_of_crowe 42 points43 points  (13 children)

So many memories that I hear tesla coils in other games.

[–]IronLanternGamer 16 points17 points  (5 children)

KIROV AIRSHIP REPORTING

[–]-FeistyRabbitSauce- 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Construction complete.

Additional resources required.

[–]LemoLuke 13 points14 points  (1 child)

"Westwood Studios"

*Chronosphere charge*

"Proudly Presents"

*Chronosphere charge*

COMMAND & CONQUER: RED ALERT

One of the best intros ever!!

[–]lotsum20 11 points12 points  (2 children)

openra.net if you wanna download and play on computer (Linux, Mac, pc)

https://youtube.com/user/CovertFlobert - fiveaces on YouTube - some good Red Alert replays and commentary.

[–]ClownFace488 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Haven't heard this song in probably over a decade, u still hum it sometimes, so good to actually hear it again!

[–]assholeinhisbathrobe 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Google cncnet if you guys still wanna play. I cant believe how many people are still playing.

[–]Doc_Osten 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Clicked the post for the bugs, stayed for the song. I had that soundtrack on repeat for a long time. Hell March was an OG hype song for younger me.

[–]_teslaTrooper 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Hell March 2 is even better imo. Composed by Frank Klepacki if anyone's looking for more of the same style.

[–]SaintGabe 2 points3 points  (0 children)

christ I had to dig so far to upvote your comment, I love the Hell March, it's like formative to my being

[–]CK1277 67 points68 points  (2 children)

Stag beetles don’t screw around.

[–]dedbeets 46 points47 points  (3 children)

BAH GAWD! BAH GAWD! THAT BUG HAS A FAMILY!

[–]-Busch-Diesel- 9 points10 points  (0 children)

AS GOD IS MY WITNESS HE IS BROKEN IN HALF

[–]godhand2nd 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I had to scroll so far, but I was rewarded with a JR quote

[–]JesusIsAJojo 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Jojolion Live Action

[–]Huff1809 37 points38 points  (16 children)

Did you really use the song from red alert?! That really takes me back lol

[–]_c-span_ 11 points12 points  (13 children)

ENGINEER REPORTING FOR DUTY

side note: I'm pretty disappointed in the RA1 remake

[–]Proud-Masterpiece 24 points25 points  (13 children)

We could spend a trillion dollars and fail to make a robot beetle as capable as a real one.

Real ones barely need to eat anything to get enough fuel to live and live.

Robot beetles can’t use energy as efficiently and quickly need to recharge.

Also real beetles are pretty smart, and can deal with a variety of circumstances.

Also they can self-replicate (with a mate).

[–]GeniusFrequency 6 points7 points  (5 children)

Replace beetle with any creature. Does the same logic apply?

[–]21stAndDistracted 24 points25 points  (5 children)

Humanity prevails!

[–]OpenUpItsFBI 29 points30 points  (3 children)

Bugs prevail

[–]beluuuuuuga 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I've already donated my soul to the bug gods. Hopefully I'm spared.

[–]CurtisLeow 6 points7 points  (1 child)

Yeah well, I'm from Buenos Aires, and I say kill 'em all!

[–]feelinlucky7 20 points21 points  (9 children)

If bugs were bigger, they’d be a fucking problem. I know they used to be due to higher O2 content in the atmosphere, but that was around the Triassic period.. I think. Can’t remember if it was pre or post Permian extinction

[–]Holybartender83 19 points20 points  (3 children)

I actually saw a really good documentary on this a while back called “Starship Troopers”. The giant bugs were indeed a fucking problem.

[–]kroganwarlord 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I'm going down a youtube rabbit hole now and it's your fault.

[–]TheSlonk 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Josuke, wanna tussle?

[–]PmMeUrMommyMilkers 9 points10 points  (2 children)

This bug went full Jon Connor. He ain't afraid of no Skynet.

[–]9erry 9 points10 points  (3 children)

Does anyone else get PS1 Red Alert nostalgia from the music or just me

[–]woeeij 5 points6 points  (1 child)

Wow, I didn't know they had original Red Alert on console. I remember playing it on my family's ancient Gateway PC. I would play 1v1s with my friends over the phone line and get in trouble for hogging the phone line for 12 hours without anyone realizing lol.

[–]I-not-human-I 6 points7 points  (0 children)

YEET the robot

[–]Galaxy01500 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Heracross vs pinsir. Epik battle

[–]Bronzeborg 6 points7 points  (0 children)

her name is sarah connor

[–]Cosmic_Honeyhawk 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Robot bug did not have de claws to hold the log to keep its stance and balance, if you look closely you can see how strongly the beetle grips it!

[–]twistedLucidlty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Terminator: Rise of the figurines

[–]nare3741 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yeee fuck him up good boi

[–]godca_grema 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Now I have to go and play Command & Conquer.