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[–]One_Called_Carter 1013 points1014 points  (30 children)

I thought these inventions were supposed to be useless.

[–]OriginallyWhat 176 points177 points  (2 children)

Yeah. I want my money back

[–]FakeOrangeOJ 44 points45 points  (0 children)

Just AFK for an hour irl, sorted

[–]SteamZerjack 101 points102 points  (5 children)

He has said it many times. His inventions are unnecessary, not useless.

[–]Tossyjames 50 points51 points  (2 children)

This looks like it could be necessary to some people though. Totally not me though *cough* *cough*...

[–]HannahTheArtist 6 points7 points  (0 children)

cough cough mouse mover EHHH HH HEM* on amHACKazon

[–]Old-Championship2531 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We need it for gta afk

[–]UnsolvedParadox 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Also not fake!

[–]Cheesemer92 14 points15 points  (15 children)

Can’t speak for all jobs, it would be useless for mine though. They track mouse movement, mouse clicks, keystrokes, etc. it would look awfully fishy from their perspective if you used this product

[–]Akegata 28 points29 points  (7 children)

What the hell? What kind of 1984 level shit is that? Is this a normal thing in the US (I'm just assuming you work in the US here)? I have never heard about an employer that tracks stuff like that, that's insane.

[–]eaford 14 points15 points  (5 children)

I recently listened to a podcast that said a majority of large businesses now track their employees through keystrokes, screen capturing or even secretly taking video of you while you are working. I also attended a workplace panel that echoed the same thing. This podcast led me to ask the IT people at work if they were tracking us. I am in the US.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (1 child)

Well don't leave us in suspense, what did the it people say?

[–]eaford 4 points5 points  (0 children)

They said they do not track us where I work, thankfully!

[–]flamaryu 7 points8 points  (1 child)

My job track all that that’s y I cover the camera. They told me more then once I need to uncover my camera. I always respond with show me in my contract where it shows I waived my privacy away and the convocation always end after that.

[–]Raz0r25 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In which they respond “you get to work from home you lazy f—k, we wouldn’t have to track you if you didn’t make stupid devices to sleep while we PAY you to work”

[–]Nearin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I sell IT to corporations, ive never encountered a software to do this, ive heard it being asked about by the banks in early covid but never heard of it again.

Most IT teams seems to struggle to keep their core assets online i highly doubt they have the FTEs to monitor these tools even if they owned them

[–]Remote_Bet_4459 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Better than employees nowadays, can't even work if they get paid well. Take every chance they get to fk u over, bringing many entrepreneurs to financial destruction the moment you can't be there for a month or 2.

[–]Peachesree 8 points9 points  (3 children)

Man, if my work did this they would think I was insane. As an ADHDer I am constantly clicking my mouse as I think, the deeper in thought the clicks escalate quickly. Lol 😂

[–]basa_maaw 4 points5 points  (2 children)

Fucking hell I do this with the caps lock key. I shit you not I've submitted screenshots to work with opaque "Caps Lock Enabled" or "Caps Lock Disabled" plastered right at the bottom of the image.

[–]Cardopusher 1 point2 points  (1 child)

instead of clearing the console with a single command i do 50 enter taps to clear it after login.

[–]basa_maaw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Literally just watched a coworker do this yesterday lmao

[–]EskimoB9 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Mine tracks work/case work over time in "office" , but I would also know they'd see this as fishy... But if I was on my last week after handing in notice, I would do it

[–]Clint_Bolduin 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very very illegal in Norway. What the hell? Do they track what you type too? Could steal passwords from that.

[–]kme2990 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s insane

[–]Hi_Im_MrMeeseek 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Its gonna be when no work gets done and everyone has to come back in lol

[–]ThederpiestOne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Unnecessary. There's a difference. This isn't necessary but it's definitely useful.

[–]NeoSniper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I too noted how he's changed his phrasing recently.

[–]Sketchelder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This one definitely is, no e way to enter a password or two factor authentication... if you work for a company that tracks hours logged in you'll have those, otherwise you wouldn't have a WFH job

[–]striker7 390 points391 points  (9 children)

Homer J. Simpson came up with this concept in 1995 using a drinking bird desk toy.

[–]seanbrockest 111 points112 points  (5 children)

That didn't end so well for the nuclear plant, or Homer's ass.

[–]lethrowaway4me 32 points33 points  (1 child)

But it did for once prevent the escape of deadly gas.

[–]LightsJusticeZ 7 points8 points  (0 children)


[–]Zestyclose-Ruin8337 2 points3 points  (2 children)

Thank god for inanimate carbon rod

[–]seanbrockest 2 points3 points  (1 child)

Fortunately he only jammed the carbon rod in a door....

[–]Zestyclose-Ruin8337 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hot Rod

[–]GaryChalmers 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Another case of r/simpsonsdidit

[–]Peeinmymouthforever 208 points209 points  (26 children)

The moving mouse if gold. Useful throughout the day

[–]sm12511 59 points60 points  (1 child)

Knowing my luck, it'd find a way to be scrolling through porn, and that's all anyone would see.

[–]cincher 25 points26 points  (11 children)

You can get a mouse jiggler on Amazon for relatively cheap.

[–]_lost_ 17 points18 points  (2 children)

Or an analog clock with a seconds hand. Lay it on its back and the mouse over the glass. The seconds hand will jiggle your mouse every minute or so. And it's 100% undetectable!

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I do this with my analog watch. Keeps my MS Teams status green, while I go to the bathroom, get coffee, and put in a load of laundry.

[–]FailsAtSuccess 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol no it's 100% detectable. But most IT departments don't care to report it, if they even care to detect it.

[–]batmanstuff 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Mine works great! I’m on the couch scrolling while working rn!

[–]Osric250 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hardware installations such as this can be detected by security and the cheap ones often have spyware loaded on them to begin with. Don't plug in random usb's into your work computer or it's more likely you'll get caught.

Methods that are more undetectable by any IT setup are an analog watch with a seconds hand under your mouse, or open up notepad and set a roll of quarters on your spacebar.

[–]fuji311 6 points7 points  (4 children)

or just download mousejiggle.exe for free

[–]Blargmode 11 points12 points  (1 child)

"Just". A computer where this would be useful will probably not allow you to download and run any program you like.

[–]fuji311 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Fair point; I'm in a scenario where I can use it daily. I work in a Citrix environment, and run the exe on my home computer.

But I also am fortunate to not work for a company that surveils me; I only run mousejiggle to keep my session from locking during video calls.

[–]NeoSniper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An app would seem much easier to detect that hardware solutions.

[–]eblackham 11 points12 points  (3 children)

Download caffeine.exe for that. No need to move the mouse.

[–]hankhillforprez 3 points4 points  (1 child)

Lots of workplaces don’t allow program downloads without IT sign off. Annoying when you have legitimate needs to do so, but honestly very understandable.

[–]sdforbda 8 points9 points  (5 children)

Yeah if the company doesn't track can and predictable movements and keystrokes. Those things are evil.

[–]Peeinmymouthforever 18 points19 points  (4 children)

I wouldn't work at a place that would do that. That sounds like a living nightmare.

[–]Lazlo8675309 13 points14 points  (1 child)

Some tech jobs pay by 10 minute increments. So they have these screen logger apps that record every second of your phone call and remote session with some 60 year old lady while you fix their printer. This is a helpdesk job. Not fun at all.

[–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Pff why would such a job come with that extra pressure when you 9/10 people you help is an angry b

[–]Jikilamed 9 points10 points  (1 child)

If you’re in America, you may already be working at one. Most states don’t require the employer to tell their employees.

[–]Peeinmymouthforever 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Not living or working out of America.

[–]THNDHALBRT 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If and only if gold?

[–]MartianLM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just left click anywhere on an empty bit of your taskbar and then weigh your spacebar down.

[–]wolfenyeager 70 points71 points  (0 children)

Stop creating useful products you fake product man!!!!!

[–]badacey 84 points85 points  (0 children)

Will it also automatically delete all incoming emails for me?

[–]iceman_x2 29 points30 points  (4 children)

The mouse part is not useless though. If something like that did exist, I’d buy it lol.

[–]NAKEJORRIS 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You can also just place your mouse on an upside down glass to make the light reflect back into the sensor causing small mouse jiggles.

[–][deleted] 34 points35 points  (4 children)

Can I cut off my finger so the fingerprint reader logs me in?

[–][deleted]  (1 child)


    [–]Even-Complaint4095 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Then someone steals it and logs into your stuff

    [–]Lysol3435 6 points7 points  (1 child)

    Simply cut off one digit for that extra hour of sleep

    [–]Strude187 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Now we’re talkin’

    [–]Raelik 23 points24 points  (4 children)

    Press ANY key

    [–]seanbrockest 23 points24 points  (3 children)

    Where's the any key?

    [–]tokyodingo 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    I don’t see any any key!

    [–]throwingitaway724 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    I think I’ll just order a tab.

    [–]RingSlayer 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    No time for that now, the computer is starting!

    [–]WowThatsRelevant 35 points36 points  (5 children)

    I rarely catch one of your posts this early!

    My work laptop required me to login, can you add that as a premium feature? Lol

    [–]ciunnc 24 points25 points  (4 children)

    This, need to log in after powering up from hibernation, then need to login to VPN, and vpb has 2FA so need to press something on the phone too, need premiums plus VIP feature.

    [–]nikstick22 4 points5 points  (3 children)

    Could probably write an auto hotkey script to do that

    [–]HoldThePao 7 points8 points  (2 children)

    A companies cyber security team is a failure if you can have hot key scripts on your computer without getting it locked down

    [–]lhamil64 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I have admin rights on my work laptop and have had AHK installed for years. It's really handy to create custom shortcuts that make me more efficient

    [–]fluteofski- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    lol. I worked as an account manager at a company and had all my oracle functions in AHK. And yeah. That company’s it security was an absolute joke.

    [–]SunDriedFart 8 points9 points  (0 children)

    Heres a tip...

    If you use microsoft teams and want your status to always show green "Available" do the following...

    Click on Calendar
    Click on Meet Now in the top right
    Click on Start Meeting
    Click on Don't Use Audio
    Click Join Now
    Click Add Participants
    Click on the three dots next to Participants on the right
    Click on Lock The Meeting (not sure if this is necessary but i do it anyway)
    Click on Lock
    Now back on the main Teams screen click on your Initials with the red status
    Click on the In A Call dropdown
    Click on Available.

    This will now keep your laptop from turning off and will always show you as available instead of changing to Away every 5 minutes of inactivity.

    Just remember to end the meeting before other calls or at the end of the day.

    [–]seanbrockest 29 points30 points  (3 children)

    You just gave every manager with staff working from home, a heart attack.

    [–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

    That’s a feature

    [–]FoodBasedLubricant 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    Fuck em

    [–]cfbytes 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    If this tricks a manager into thinking someone is working, thats on them.

    [–]clapton1970 8 points9 points  (1 child)

    This is by far the most useful one I’ve seen from this guy

    [–]Strude187 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Idk, the Christmas tree made of booze was pretty solid too.

    [–]undisputed_truth 5 points6 points  (0 children)

    Does it come in green

    [–]its_k1llsh0t 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    This is amazing but you’d sleep a lot better if you turned off the lights OP.

    [–]Strude187 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    His head is also touching the headboard, idk why but that feels worse than sleeping with the lights on.

    [–]Happy_Web7324 3 points4 points  (1 child)

    look up "moving patterns" on your phone, place mouse on top of phone screen

    [–]fluteofski- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I just put a mouse moving app on my laptop and it did the trick.

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    People have too much free time 😂

    [–]czarchastic 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    /r/overemployed would love this. Pretending to be on their laptops is a way of life there.

    [–]Particular_Donut_686 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    This is the first thing that he made that is actually usefull

    [–]Thinkful- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    This should’ve been called the alarm clock in

    [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    This invention actually sounds useful.

    [–]Hawkmek 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I need this in my life

    [–]dilldoeorg -1 points0 points  (3 children)

    could've been easily done using macros

    [–]Thecoolestguyyoukno 12 points13 points  (2 children)

    Isn't that the useless inventions guy from YouTube?

    [–]WowThatsRelevant 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    Yeah this is his actual reddit account too

    [–]Thecoolestguyyoukno 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    That's what I thought so it makes sense why he would do it this way

    [–]Moody_GenX -3 points-2 points  (2 children)

    This is one of the few of his inventions I probably wouldn't use.

    [–]seanbrockest 4 points5 points  (1 child)

    Because you don't work from home?

    [–]Moody_GenX 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    No, I'm retired.

    [–]Jakeysuave -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

    These videos got old fast

    [–]Siaten -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    I don't know why and it's likely some kind of telling psychological or personality flaw of my own, but I have an unreasonable hatred for you and your shit inventions.

    Every time I see your dumbass posts of these trash products, I get intrusive violent urges. I can't even explain why. My best guess is that you've created a perfect rage storm in my brain. The punchable expressions you make remind me of a village idiot, but clearly you are smart enough to invent things. However, you're also a moron for putting that intelligence towards useless inventions. Except, you do all this inventing with a clear goal of comedy: an admirable aspiration.

    So, I'd typically put you in a box with Carrot Top: an aesthetically revolting smart-guy with a penchant for prop comedy. Unfortunately, one thing makes you even more confusing than fucking Carrot Top, which is a feat in itself: the goddamn pornstache. Somehow you've achieved all your fame and success with that creepy caterpillar on your lip that is astoundingly even more distracting than Carrot Top's wild gingerfro.

    Congratulations, I fucking hate you, you brilliant, handsomely revolting comedian.

    [–]JoeteckTips -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

    This will be outlawed and illegal soon.

    [–]WildCardJesusBrewing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Take all of my money

    [–]N3wDadWhoDis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    You're the genius/great inventor of our time.

    [–]grelgen 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    how does it do with 2FA? asking for someone else who doesn't work in the government.

    [–]Lazlo8675309 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Working multiple I.T. jobs from home be like wake up hit space bar to wake pc and show green online statuses. Go eat breakfast.

    [–]xAUSxReap3r 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    The mouse movement doesn't line up.

    [–]msur 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Unfortunately I need a password randomly generated by my phone to log in, then another random password to get into the VPN, and even if your device could do that, I'd still need to get up to feed the dogs.

    [–]Dizzy_One3336 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Amazing how official this is being presented

    [–]Anime_animus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    AFK discord mods.

    [–]CL4P-TRAP 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I want you to make a finger attachment that can bypass the login screen

    [–]thefartsock 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Can I buy five for my five remote jobs?

    [–]LoganN64 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'll give you $200 for your contraption!

    [–]Leefordhamsoldmeout1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Hotel Vermont making an appearance.

    [–]RoBot-210 0 points1 point  (0 children)


    [–]Munchie1010 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I’m going to give one of these to my brother but make it so it opens his secret folder.

    [–]KongXiangXIV 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Just open notepad, and put one of those tall thin skin serum bottles on your space bar 👀

    [–]runningman299 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    He’s only gone and knocked it out of the park again.

    [–]IGotSkills 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I legit want to buy this

    [–]FrenchMaisNon 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I want to do that guy so badly.

    [–]Tiiiimmmooo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Feeding the boomer Facebook posts with malarkey creations like this

    [–]robvya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This a good invention for gamers who wants to stay in-game lol

    [–]DocHanks 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    i’m watching this on the toilet. with my wireless mouse next to me on this fine morning. pretty ironic.

    [–]mrjosemeehan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Interesting that you didn't use the word "unnecessary" this time...

    [–]Much-Meringue-7467 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Can it handle 2FA?

    [–]cfacpa6 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Where can I purchase this??? 😂

    [–]Lollipoop_Hacksaw 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Yeah, that's not how that shit works...

    Funny-ass invention nonetheless.

    [–]Saugeen-Uwo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    As a fully remote worker I laughed out loud - but don't ruin it for us who are productive!!!

    [–]LoneWolf4717 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Man, you're turning into the Onion of inventors. "This is so ridiculous, it's clearly a joke!", when reality has actually caught up and made it feasible

    [–]ProbablyBeOK 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I knew it!!

    [–]obi_wan_kenobi_1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Caffiene.. this app simulates the press of F18 button , which keyboards don't have. Keeps your computer from sleeping.

    [–]Funghiski 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I want it too, at least I can watch porn

    [–]SadWizrD 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Nobody mentioning that the mouse is not rotating the thing it’s on is? That arrow moving on the screen doesn’t correspond to the mouse movement. It doesn’t even work🫠

    [–]Xenosaiga 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This design is very human

    [–]thebankroll 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This is why robots will take over

    [–]Novel-Letter8112 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Never log off!

    [–]ZedGardner 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    this guy is the reason they want us to come back to the office…

    [–]Smoove-the1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    And that ladies and gents is why you can't work from home anymore!!! 🤣🤣

    [–]graven_raven 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I want this lol

    [–]rik182 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Or just download caffeine.exe

    [–]Junior_Bullfrog2581 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Couldn’t imagine having an office job

    [–]TheFkngPianist 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This shit is actualy legit i would buy that

    [–]Bedenkelijk 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Jokes on us, his job is making TikTok’s

    [–]Environmental-Bag-66 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    This shit is why companies are forcing people back to the office

    [–]DepthFromAbove 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    You wouldn’t need to create a physical device to script mouse movement.. Y’all never heard of coding? Apps? Programs? Nothing?

    [–]KingOfTheKush1990 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    What exactly are fake products lol

    [–]FurtiveTho 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I need this!

    [–]KevinKingsb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I'm not gonna lie, I kind of do this. I work from home, and I have definitely clocked in and plugged in my USB mouse mover, and went back to bed for an hour.

    [–]Magazine-Plane 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Yeah. Thats not how productivity is tracked by any company. Its not like, Yup his mouse is moving so he must be working hard.

    [–]Magazine-Plane 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Plus you need to LOG IN!!!!

    [–]OkFoot1893 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    WADU will catch and flag this repetitive motion in 5 min lol

    [–]inboxmeyourredfoxes 0 points1 point  (0 children)


    [–]Fluffy_Meringue_6462 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Look at this guy’s post history- he’s on the biggest karma grind of his life. /j

    [–]Bad-ass-mo-fo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Need upgrade to log into VPN!

    [–]Bdk48126 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Mouse movers are a real thing. My company could tell if I was online by checking Slack. It would show a green dot if you were online. Bought one and it worked great