[MINI FAQ] Do I have to be a woman to participate here? What about the subreddit name? What about trans women? What are the rules, anyway?
So my husband and I have a wonderful relationship and have been together going on 10 years.
Well we love to spend time together. The other day we carpooled to work together and got to spend the morning with eachother it was chill and really nice.
My husband's job has a group meeting once a month. So that day they asked everyone to share a "positive" and people share a positive in the last month. Kid graduated, got the car fixed etc....
Well my husband brought up our lovely morning together and how he dropped me off at work and how nice that was and it brightened his day.
I am not kidding you evvvveryyyy man responded with something along the li es of "I'd kill myself if I had to drive to work with my wife" "oh my God how is that a positive" "it would ruin my day if I had to do that"... all very publicly and in front of allll their co workers. And even trying to shame my husband for enjoying my company and wanting to spend time with me.
I'm just convinced that most husband's do not like their wives abd really just don't want to spend time with them or their families. Like how! How am I lucky that I have a partner that enjoys my company? Is that the bar?
Jesus the bar is in the ground I swear.
I (35 f)Wanted to watch the Barbie movie and thought my husband(40 m) would be down to watch it with me(he said he was).
Not even 10 minutes into the movie and he's like this is boring as fuck.. this movie is for kids blah blah
So I say fine we don't have to watch this..cause obviously you don't want to. I'll watch it by myself some other time...So I turn it to something else.
To which he then starts googling the movie and what men think of it along with if men should watch it... Pulls up some random shit from the Internet..
Hes like I don't need to watch this... We have tons of discussions and what not. It's for conservative men blah blah blah...
Just having an attitude about it.
Now he all annoyed from it and decided to wash dishes while listening to very heavy metal and then go work down in the garage so I can watch my movie... or whatever.. over a movie.... Like seriously..
Obviously am not gonna watch it now while he around.. hell it's date night but just cause he didn't like what I choose even tho he said sure he having a tantrum.. fucking men..
I get that he has epilepsy and the meds don't help but is it just me or is this uncalled for? Feel like am the bad guy for wanting to watch Barbie...
The book is The Experienced Midwife, by William Salmon and Aristotle
I thought this community might be interested in some outtakes. Here are some things it said
1 "It is not the having these parts, but the unlawful use of them that causes shame" (regarding female anatomy)
2 The larger the clitoris is, the more lustful the woman
3 A woman cannot conceive if she did not enjoy the sex
4 Embryos are nourished by menstrual blood until the umbilical cord forms. If the menstrual cycle doesn't stop with pregnancy, it is because the embryo couldn't eat it all
5 Pregnancies with female babies are more painful than those of sons
6 A "sinewy production" called the urachos leads from the bladder to the belly button to expel the urine of the fetus. Anatomists say no such organ exists, but the writer knows it does, because he knows two adults who told him they could pee out of their belly buttons with no negative impact on their health.
7 Umbilical cords should be cut longer for boys, as it makes their penis longer. Girls' umbilical cords should be cut short, so their vaginas will be narrow. This will make them "acceptable to their husbands"
8 Conception can't happen without love. "if their hearts be not united in love, how should their seed unite to cause conception; and this is evidently evinced in that there never follows a conception on a rape"
I posted in this sub a couple months ago about my ex. Long story short, we had a horrific rship where he was incredibly abusive, I dumped him, he begged for me back and literally 2 days later changed his mind and started dating someone else.
On the surface, he was super into her. They spent every day together, posting pictures, having fun, etc. Behind her back, he was still telling me how he was hung up on me but things just wouldn't work out between us (because he was/is a toxic asshole, but he couldn't deal w that lol). I did not disagree - I just didn't point out that the reason we didn't work out was all him.
3 months into their relationship, he dumps her (she didn't take it well, tried to change his mind multple times) and comes running back to me. I tell him if he works on himself, I'll consider it. He did not. He tried to lead me on into a situationship and I noped out of it real fast. He got angry and "sad" about my rejection - you know, because I didn't want to be led on.
Cut to a couple weeks later and as per usual, he's back to his fuckboy ways and oh yeah, his rebound girl has become one of his (many) fuckbuddies.
I cannot emphasize how sorry I feel for this woman, settling first for being a rebound and now hoping that if she hangs around long enough, he'll get back with her. She is in her... early 30s, I think, and I'm in my late 20s, and I truly wish I could tell her to please move on, stop wasting her life and leave this man who is only out to use her kindness. I put up with for 1.5 years and it was not worth it at all. He literally told me, "She's such a people pleaser it was becoming unattractive" and I was actually speechless.
Do not, I repeat, do not settle for being with an abusive or even neglectful man. Do not settle for being a rebound or for bare minimum. Be so wary of manipulative men who just got dumped and are lovebombing you because they're more likely hunting for validation than actually interested in you. You deserve better. You are worth so much more than people who are more interested in walking all over you than they are in you as a person.
Ten years ago I got out of my last long term relationship and I started a dating journal. I was 26 at the time and have since kept track of every date I've been on. Today I went back and read through most of it and found it fascinating. I'm sure some of the changes were from my personality and preferences evolving over the years as I got older, but some are definitely major cultural changes.
Anecdotal trends I noticed: Openly dating is much more open. It's common for men to openly talk about the other women they are seeing now. This NEVER happened ten years ago, it seems like it really changed after COVID.
Dating apps seems to be the exclusive way to meet people now. Rarely does someone just come up and talk to me when I'm out. I also don't usually talk to a stranger when I'm out myself, so I'm part of the problem.
First dates are WAY more casual, personally I think it's a good change. Most are just a drink or a coffee. I haven't had a first date at a movie or full dinner since 2018.
I split all bills on dates now. Probably comes from a more stable financial situation being further in a career, but it seems like it's just understood that it's going to be split.
Guys apparently HATE wearing condoms now. Everytime I bring it up they act like I'm from the dark ages. "Oh, I haven't used a condom in years" is a common response. In almost all encounters when I started the journal it wasn't even a conversation, guys just put one on when it progressed to the point where we were having sex.
In their defense, almost every guy now has a recent STD test result on their phone and gladly shows it off.
To go along with this. If not specifically discussed, guy's not wearing a condom just don't pull out. In 2013-2016 that happened 0 times. No discussion was default to pull out. 2020-2023, 100% of the time if not discussed they did NOT pull out.
Grooming seems to have fallen away. Lot's of unkempt bushes, not a good trend.
Ghosting is super common now. Since 2020, 60% of guys I actually met for a date completely ghosted at one point with no reason given.